This post is just a little bit more of some things I wanted to say/explain in the previous video. So if you haven’t watched that one, be sure to do so or else you might not get everything.
The video was, as you could probably tell, very messy. I was thinking about making it a regular post at first, however, I wanted to get my point across better. Though I did forget to mention a few things.
I chose TY and a relationship over our ‘friendship’ because there is a future for me with him. My friend and I could’ve also had a future together, like her coming to Taiwan to meet him or him coming here to meet her(for example). However, I will not want to marry my friend, I will not want to live with my friend. There is no future like that with a friend. There is a future like that however with TY. Now, as stated before, I don’t know how things will go but I do know we both want the same. We’re very mature in that part of life and we can only hope our plans will actually happen some day.
The part where I said I don’t regret anything and I don’t feel bad about making the decision I’ve made, I said that because even if TY wasn’t in the picture, our friendship would not have lasted either way. There were a lot of other problems we had and her being jealous and possesive wasn’t the only problem she had. I’m not saying she was all to blame because there have been made mistakes on my end as well. I have never been a 100% clear with her, saying: Okay, until here and no further. This is where my boundary is.
Because she was my only friend and at the end of the day, I just don’t like confrontation. We both made mistakes but I know the biggest issue that ended it all, was us growing apart. And I’ve had this happen COUNTLESS of times with all the friends I’ve had along the years. I feel like I’ve grown and moved on and all the ‘friends’ are standing still and not growing with me. Which is fine, however don’t try to drag me back down where you are. Don’t say I’ve changed for the worse, when I literally have only grown for the better.
There’s so many people that have exited out of my life so far and I know I’m definitely not the only one here. I am okay now, to say: I’ve only got 1 friend and my boyfriend. I’ve only got my co-workers to talk to on a daily basis and my parents. I’m okay with that, because most, if not all people pretend to be someone they are not. They pretend to be your friend and then they end up leaving you, they end up manipulating you, they end up being anything other than a friend. I’m more than happy to be in this situation right now and of course I’m always open to meet new people and end up gaining another pal. However, I will not, ever, let someone make decisions for me again. I will not let anybody tell me what I’m doing is wrong, when it is clearly not. I will not, let somebody take away my chances of being happy. I’ve done that before and I ended up feeling terrible for a very long time.
If you are in a situation similiar to this, know that you’re definitely not alone, not just me but surely countless of other people have dealt with this as well. Know that you are the one that gets to make decisions in your life. Know that if you’re happy then that is all that matters. Bro’s before ho’s, sisters before misters still goes here.. But only if they really are good friends and if they want the best for you. If they want to see you happy and see you do the things you want to do and try to help you achieve those goals and make those plans happen, then that’s a good friend. I have one of those good friends now and she’s actually someone from Middle School as well, whom I’ve been out of contact with for a few years… Surprise surpise, BECAUSE of that same girl I talked about in the video. Look back, reflect, smile or let out a tear and move on. It’s your life, your relationship, your decision. And never let anyone take that away from you because it’s the most precious thing you have in life 🙂